B doesn't understand my disdain. He likes the cold. He is a freak. He sits happily next to me sipping his tea while I claw at my arms and legs. My skin is so dry I want to peel it from my body for relief from the itch. It has spread to my brain. I am restless. I pour over pictures of myself and my friends with tanned, shimmering skin and bathing suits and flip flops and I want to be there. Oh god, I want to be there.
Time is flying by, but suddenly it's not fast enough. There is still not enough space between me and the things that happened. I need more space.
In other news: my dog is so tired of me taking pictures of him. I'm serious. Everytime he looks all cute and I pull out my camera he does this freakishly human-like sigh. Like you know when you tell a kid he can't have that 56th piece of candy and he's all ooooooooh in that high pitched, drawn out kid way? That's pretty much exactly what Rooney sounds like. But it's winter and I'm stuck inside all night so I have nothing better to do. I'm sorry if I can't find more amusing things to do, like licking my own crotch or chewing the heels off my new red pumps or eating out of the trash.
And the other night when I was scrolling through all of the pictures on my camera I realized that most of them were of Rooney and B was all can you please not be one of those nerds who makes Facebook albums filled with nothing but pictures of your dog? and I was like psh please, dude, what kind of a dork do you take me as? and then he showed me an entire year's worth of my Facebook albums that primarily featured my old dog and sometimes a few friends, like that time I went on vacation for a week and the only pictures I took were of my dog. Whatever.
And yes, these are all new pictures that I've snapped over the past few weeks. Rooney just looks like he hasn't grown because he hasn't grown. I think he's a midget. I'm an equal opportunity dog owner. And in case you were wondering, he jumps pretty high and definitely wouldn't have any problem biting you in the balls, robbers, so don't get any ideas.
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8 comments:
Look, I'm all about taking a bazillion pics of my dogs, so keep 'em coming. Also -I effing HATE WINTER now. It makes me want to cry, I want spring so bad.
Come visit me, it's already up to 55 degrees here :D
I never thought I would see so much snow in Washington state. I used to like the stuff.
I HATE YOU SNOW. I will support your petition to mother nature to stop such shenanigans.
And you have to keep the dog pics comin'. I take just as many of my cat, so know I know I'm not alone in this.
HERE'S TO SOME FREAKING WARM (but not too warm) WEATHER!
Too bad your company is not taking the same trip as last year. I will be there again in two weeks... Jealous?
Dogs.
They will chew a hole in your heart.
I am not understanding this. Is there something funny or weird about taking lots of pictures of your dog? Hmpf. *scratches head*
It could be worse. You could be incessantly photographing rodents.
Or spiders.
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