Last night I had a dream that I accidentally traveled through time. I woke up in a field of yellow flowers next to Hurley, who was alive and well. So actually, maybe I didn't time travel, maybe I was dead.
Anyway, regardless of how I got there, I was there and I was so happy to be with Hurley again that I decided right then and there that I would be staying in this happy field slash maybe heaven but probably actually purgatory because who am I kidding, and be with my dog forever and Billy and Rooney would do just fine without me in the future slash Earth.
And I was so happy because oh my gah I love that dog. But then we got a little tired of the field so we walked to my office, where I learned that Joe Biden was in town and it was my job to think of fun and creative things for him to do while he was here because isn't that what writers do, think of creative things?
I wasn't too thrilled to have any job at all to do, even if it was think of fun things to do with Joe Biden who would probably be a pretty fun dude to do fun things with, if I had my choice of vice presidential candidates to do fun things with.
I just wanted to hang out with my dog. So I turn my back for two seconds and Joe Biden is gone and suddenly everyone is all oooohh boss is gonna killlll youuuu you lost Joe Biiideenn oooohhhh. And I'm like WTF, Joe Biden, couldn't you have just sat still for like two seconds, if I get fired I swear to gah I'll get that Palin lady to teach me how to shoot.
And I'm all annoyed at Joe Biden and I'm slightly stressed and can't you people just leave me alone so I can play with my dead dog? So then I'm a bit like whatever, let's peace, Hurl dog, when Joe Biden throws open the door, shakes my hand, thanks me for the great day, and tells me to lay off the pot.