After a night of heavy drinking this weekend, B decided to take Rooney for a hike through the woods and I decided to tag along, hoping the fresh forest air would exorcise the demons that were currently taking a pickaxe to my brain.
B: WOW you are moving really slow today.
Me: It's not me. It's the tequila. Plus I'm having some major cramping issues right now in my abdomen.
B: Strange, I thought it would be in your liver.
Me: Oooh gah I bet it's cancer. Whenever I have stomach issues I assume the cancer's back to get me. Or maybe I'm pregnant ... Jesus Christ, I hope it's cancer.
B: You are one of the worst humans I have ever met.
Well would YOU want to find out your were with child the night after a tequila binge?